Trust

I need Jesus. That's it. I keep coming back to it, because it's so true. He's in control. He is love, He is truth, and He will never let me down. I don't know why I fail to trust so often. I am constantly needing reminders to who He is, and of who I am in Him. Yet even then, I often find myself (very often in fact) trying to direct my own steps, doubting in His leading. Like, theoretically I know it, but in my actions I am still so full of doubt.

Well I'm ready Jesus. I'm ready to lay down my life, and along with it my ideas about how things should happen and in what timing, and just trust You. You are faithful. You know who I am and your Word tells me that you prepared good works in advance for me to do. So this doesn't mean that I'm going to be apathetic in my faith, but rather that I'm going to lay down all that worry, insecurity, doubt and fear. I'm not picking it up anymore, and am certainly NOT going to make it part of my identity.

Thank you Lord, that my life is in your hands. Your plans are good, pleasing, and perfect (Romans 12:2), and you have plans to propser me, to give me a hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11). I can write this knowing that my future, my present, my hopes, my dreams, all is in your hands. I can trust you with my life, and I do. Here's my life. Lead me, reveal Yourself to me, guide me and direct me, use my life to further your kingdom. Teach me how to trust you, how to relax, how to see beyond myself, and truly serve and love others. I want my life to be a God-centered, God-focused life, and everything else will fall into place. You are my all in all, help me to really live like it. Teach me how to walk with you. Thank you Jesus.

Blogging

Blogging... the word just sounds so nerdy and computer geekish, but I'm probably more of a computer geek than I even think I am, so I'll give it a try.

Tomorrow is the LAST day of class of my junior year! After that I have finals until May 8, then I take the GRE May 17, then I'm off to The Gathering Place on May 21st! Wow... I feel stressed even thinking about it! :) One thing at a time, one day at a time. I'll make it. The Lord will provide me with all that I need.

I can't believe that I'm going to be a senior next year! Wow, time really does fly by. I never thought I'd be done with college, and now here I am about to enter my SENIOR year. Amazing. And me, the person who has on several occasions contemplated leaving school for missions, or IHOP is now considering Graduate School! Talk about a change of heart right there! hehe...

Only the Lord knows, though, what I'll really be doing after I graduate. I might be in Grad school, or maybe end up in South America or Africa or something, or even something else! The cool thing is that God's plans are perfect, so wherever He leads, it's exactly where I'm supposed to be, and His plans for my life are exactly what will really fulfill me. Thank God for His faithfulness for directing my steps. I'm tired of trying to direct my own steps- especially since my heart is wicked, self-seeking, and deceitful. God, who is pure of heart, has the true, omniscent perspective, and He knows not only what I need but also what will truly fulfill me, and He desires to see me walk in the path He has set out for me. That doesn't mean that His way will be without suffering, indeed His word says that all who desire to live godly in Christ Jesus will be persecuted. (2 Timothy 3:12). Yet, I should rejoice in my sufferings, because suffering produces perseverance; persevearnce, character' and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out His love into our hearts by His Holy Spirit, whom He can given us. Romans 5:3-5.

Thanks be to God, who gives us the VICTORY through our Lord Jesus Christ. - 1 Cor. 15:57

I Love you Jesus. Thank you for taking care of me, for leading me and guiding me, and lovingly directing my steps in your perfect will for my life. Amen.